"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, Cocksucker, Motherfucker and Tits"

Those seven words would get me thrown off the air if this were a radio station. I may find a couple of the words distasteful, but since I have a bad taste in my mouth anyway today, I don't mind saying them.

I don't listen to Howard much anymore. He's getting jaded - no surprise, he's been on the air so long and has a lot of markets to please. So the impact of his removal in six markets is minimal to me, especially since he is currently still on the air in Dallas. But then again, when Al-Qaeda started using buildings for target practice on 9/11, I didn't know anyone personally then either, but I still got upset about it. Why did I get upset about it, I hear you ask? Because it was a cowardly attack that involved the deaths of thousands of innocent people. We had not attacked Al-Qaeda, yet they chose to attack us. Once I had calmed down, and found I was still upset after two years, I volunteered for the Naval Reserves. I passed ASVAP, but have heard nothing since. In less than a month I will be permanently ineligible to join the armed forces, since on March 24th I hit the big 4-0. My boss's son recently joined the reserves, and he will be sent to Iraq in April for 18 months.

We attacked the Taliban because they provided a warm, safe environment in which the infection of Al-Qaeda could grow. We destroyed them and are in Afghanistan to give the people a chance to grow and find their own identity again. We were right to go in, and we are right to stay.

Iraq is another matter. We killed thousands of innocent people in the destruction of Saddam's regime. They had not attacked us. The reasons we went in were bogus. They had no weapons of Mass Destruction. We were wrong to go in, but having gone in, we now are obliged to stay, to allow Iraqi's to grow and find their identity just like the Afghans, since we were responsible for the downfall of their government.

So three countries have been changed by 9/11. Afghanistan, Iraq and the United States. In between Afghanistan and Iraq, lies the second of Bush's Axis of Evil members - Iran. Iran is a Religious dictatorship, where free speech is non-existent, and the government decides the morality of the country's people. Those who disagree with this are ostracized at best, imprisoned or killed at worst.

I don't want to live in Iran. I've travelled to the middle east before. I found the ancient architecture and spirituality impressive, and the Tea is pretty good also. But despite that (call me old fashioned), I would rather live in a country where I can criticize the government. Where I CAN practice any damn religion I please. Where I CAN hear opposing views on important issues, and where I CAN, on occasion, seen an exposed nipple.

No-one ever died from nipple poisoning. No homeless guy was ever found dead in a back alley with three 9 mm nipples lodged in his chest. No wife was ever beaten senseless by her drunken husband brandishing a nipple. No terrorist organization has ever tried to fly a nipple into an office building, or to explode a radiological nipple in the middle of a football game. There are no Nipples of Mass Destruction. Christ had nipples. The Virgin Mary had nipples. Moses had nipples. Buddha had nipples. Mohammed had nipples. To my certain knowledge, none of those nipples were ever used in a malicious or destructive mannner.

Yet one nipple, apparently, has the ability to do just as much constitutional damage to this country as Al-Qaeda Airlines.

Since 9/11, The rights of Americans have been curtailed. The FBI can enter your house with a secret warrant issued by a secret judge, and they need never alert you or ask your permission. You don't even need to be home. You can be held without trial or legal counsel indefinitely.

Since Superbowl Sunday, the freedom of speech rights of the media have been curtailed. Howard has been pulled in six markets, because a caller said a bad word and they didn't catch it in time. The NBC show ER, which has always done their best to show the true grit of the emergency room has pulled scenes because they may be too controversial. And celebrities and individuals alike are being censored and censured left and right for making truthful yet 'controversial' comments on nipples, government officials and gay marriage.

America is devolving into Sado-Masochism. And not in a good way. We have begun shooting ourselves in the foot at every opportunity. Or at least at every opportunity where there isn't someone else we can go Attack. Iraq was attacked because it was easily winnable, and Bush was spoiling for a fight. They had no weapons of mass destruction, no nuclear program, no plans to attack the US. North Korea on the other hand, is happy to announce it has the first two and is working hard towards the third. I don't see us rushing in to a fight there, do you? No, and you know why? Because our armed forces are spread so bloody thin after this administration's military misadventures that we can barely spare 40,000 troops for defense of South Korea, let alone raise the neccessary forces to actually remove any threat from North Korea.

We have become the schoolyard bully, always spoiling for a fight, but only with those weaker than us. The best way to deal with a Bush-era American is to lock him in a room on his own. Sooner or later he will simply beat himself up.

That goes for the country as a whole. As we continue to isolate ourselves from the world community, entering it only when we want to kick someone in the nuts, the American psyche will become restless, and will turn in on itself. I swear to you by all that is holy that if dipshit stays in office for another four years, we will lose America for good. We will tear her to pieces in civil war.

I pay taxes. Actually, I pay a lot of taxes. My taxes, and yours too, pay for Bush to be President. This is an email I sent to Bush today, via [email protected]. I suggest you copy and paste this and do the same:

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To: The President of the United States

From: The Taxpayer that pays your Salary

Subject: Warning

George,

I don't want to have to remind you that I pay your salary. I am paying you to protect the Life, Liberty, Property and Pursuit of Happiness of myself and my fellow Americans.

I am NOT paying you to be the Guardian of my morals, my marriage, or my religion. This is not Iran. Stop behaving like the Ayatollah.

Furthermore, as Commander in Chief of the Armed Forces of the United States, I must insist that you follow the Rules of Engagement. If you have credible intelligence that there is a Clear and Present Danger, you are authorized to remove that danger. In all other cases, do not fire unless fired upon. And I strongly suggest you beef up the efficiency of the intelligence community to prevent us being fired upon.

Finally, consider this a written warning. If I do not see a rapid and sincere improvement in your behavior, and I mean right now, then come November I will have you replaced.

Yours,

A Taxpayer.

P.S. Sorry to hear about Millie.

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