And then all the various platforms (Microsoft, Unix, Linux, Novell) that I have worked with to a fair degree, the systems (SAP, JD Edwards, Peoplesoft etc) and the positions I've held (Everything from Systems Operator to CIO)

Sometimes they will make guesses. For example in Jack Astor's the other day one of the waiters came up to me.

"We're all wondering - are you a book critic?" to which I replied "Yes". Because its true. And most of the reviewing I do, I do in Jack Astors, tucked away in a smoking booth of a lunchtime, eating my fajitas without the tortillas.

Last night, I went to Wal-mart to buy stuff to make the Cadeucus Wand. After fiddling around unsuccessfully with two plastic snakes, I decided to get some green cord and just wrap it around the wand. At the drapery counter I asked the lady for 2 yards of the green cord. She looked at my other purchases - feathers, dowel etc.

"What are you making?"
"A Cadeucus"
"Ah...This cord will make good snakes"
"Yes" says I, somewhat surprised.
"Are you a doctor or a priest?"
"A Priest"

Which is also true. Maybe not the priest she was expecting. Or maybe it was. Hard to say.

The bottom line is, I have no idea how to really sum up who I am or what I do in one sentence, without sounding like an unfocused beachbum. Catpewk TV. Hmmm - now there's a thought. Nope. I would rather have my tongue tied to a tailpipe and be dragged buck naked at 90 miles per hour across a field of broken glass, than give my life over to the American public for 7 weeks or however long that Todd guy is doing it. I'm sorry, but as much as I like individuals, people en masse are about as responsible as a monkey with a gas can.

So I guess I am just going to have to ponder this question for years to come, unless I stop doing everything except one thing. Maybe then at least, I could do one thing well...