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Mountains and MolehillsMountains and Molehills

2006-06-07 - 7:15 a.m.
Some parents have it worse than others. When the police turn up at the door, most people will immediately think "Oh my God, has there been an accident? What happened?"

But a small, unfortunate section of the population will simply sigh and say "Ok, what did he do now?"

Every four or eight years, America gives birth to a new President. Since being President ages you rapidly, our current Commander-in-Chief is currently well into his adolescence and acting out very badly.

This particular electoral offspring is currently trying to stop his party's defeat (if not complete demise) in the November congressional elections. And since the last 5 and a half years (is that really all its been?) have seen the US pounded into the dirt by the world because (and this is the fundamental issue) everyone hates President Bush, it is very hard for him to find an issue to engage his rapidly shrinking base (which the last poll* showed consisted mostly of the paramilitary wing of the KKK and aging SS former officers).

Which is why we have been subjected to a litany of off-topic issues over the past few months. Illegal immigration, English as the national language, and now Gay Marriage II - the Sequel.

By putting these issues front and center, the news media doesn't get to use precious column inches on real topics such as the War in Iraq, the War in Afghanistan, the total lack of progress in finding Osama Bin Laden, The nuclear issue in Iran and North Korea, the Palestinian rapidly-approaching Civil War, the Zimabwean rapdily-approaching Civil War, Darfur, Global Warming, and a dozen or so other things that involve people starving and dying. All these issues are real, valid, important issues that the Republican administration has either refused to look at, or worse, got involved and exacerbated an already bad situation.

So for the next few months we have to put up with dumbass (yeah you heard me) discussions about whether we should officially change the name of Los Angeles to 'The City of Angels', whether Harry can marry Barry, and what to do if the maid that cleans your house every two weeks for a pittance starts demanding minimum wage.

I hope that the education system in America hasn't collapsed completely. Because if it has, then some of our new voting Americans may actually be fooled by this nonsense into voting these nimrods back into office come November.

If they do, I'm going to start selling buttons that say 'Wear your mushroom with Pride'.

* ...that I took

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